Monday, December 17, 2007

Mike Huckabee and the Mormons

It kind of surprised me the other day when Mike Huckabee asked a New York Times reporter (probably a Jew) whether Mormons believe that Jesus Christ and Satan are brothers. It seems to me that the Rev. Huckabee ought to know since he was one of my visiting professors at the DeVry Evangelical Institute in Waco, TX.

The Rev. Huckabee taught a course called "Lesser Faiths 101".

Along with Judaism, Islam, Catholicism, Hinduism and Paganism, the Rev. Huckabee taught us all about Mormonism. I've still got my notes. So according to the Rev. Huckabee:

— Mormon Church: should be called Church of Latter Day Ain'ts. Ain't Christian, ain't holy, ain't no way Smith was a prophet.

— Not only do they believe that Jesus and Satan are brothers, Mormons believe the brothers are both married to a woman named Betty. (I'm not sure if it's the same woman or two women, both named Betty.)

— Mormons refer to the virgin birth as the Rape of Mary.

Anyway, if Mitt Romney wants to know anything about being a Mormon, all he has to do is ask the Rev. Huckabee.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Karl Rove: "I was always against the war in Iraq"

It turns out the reason that Karl Rove left the White House before President Bush's term was over was because the President failed to heed his advice on Iraq. I know this because I accidently got a preview of Mr. Rove's upcoming memoir, "As American as a Hand Gun in Church". (All memoirs that might have National Security implications have to be vetted by the government before they can be published. That's how I saw Mr. Rove's manuscript.)

According to Mr. Rove, he fought against the invasion of Iraq based on the Weapons of Mass Destruction scenario. He writes:

I was always against the war in Iraq. I knew Saddam Hussein for years. He was one of my Facebook friends. I knew he liked to talk tough but inside he was a marshmallow. There was no way he would have WMDs. Whenever he killed ten or twenty thousand people, it was always with conventional weapons.

Mr. Rove points out that it was the Congressional Democrats who forced the President into a war. He writes:

President Bush was in no mood to attack Iraq. After all, he had focused all of his attention on finding Obama bin Laden. (I'm not sure if this is a typo or not.) In fact, Democrats like Pelosi and Biden and especially Hillary Clinton demanded a quick vote on attacking Iraq. And because the President is a "uniter", he decided to let the Democrats have their way. But I was against it.

Mr. Rove discusses how Vice-President Cheney ruined the Rove legacy. He writes:

I had created the greatest legacy America had ever seen, greater than Washington, greater than Lincoln. After all, Washington was an actual war hero and Lincoln was a brilliant thinker. I was able to take someone who [description to be finalized before printing] and mold him into a person who could twice be elected to the highest office in the land without an iota of original thought, courage or even the ability to communicate his thoughts, had he had any. Then Cheney, who had been playing "Doom" non-stop for six weeks got it into his head to attack Iraq for no good reason. I'm pretty sure that video game had made him psychotic. Anyway, instead of being remembered as the master president-maker, I'll just be remembered like Pinocchio's father.

I had no idea that Mr. Rove was so prescient.

Friday, December 07, 2007

The Mitt Romney Musical


Here's something interesting about one of the leading Republican presidential candidates.

As you might have heard, Gov. Romney is a Mormon. When he was in college in Utah, he had the lead part in the all-Mormon musical production of "Seven Brides for Two Brothers."

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