The Secret Service has ordered me to post this

All that stuff I wrote about Karl Rove. None of it is true. He really did not have pictures of John Kerry and Osama Bin Laden eating dinner at Denny's. And that stuff about talking notes for Coulter and Hannity. I must have been mistaken. The White House has never told journalists what to say. And no one who works at the White House has ever procured a young woman for Bill O'Reilly. I swear.