Why Harriet Miers withdrew from the Supreme Court nomination

Harriet Miers learned only yesterday, weeks after accepting President Bush's nomination for Supreme Court Justice, that she will no longer be able to bill at $600 per hour for her time.

"What do you mean, Supreme Court judges are paid a flat salary?" Ms. Miers was heard to say to Andrew Card, President Bush's Chief of Staff. "I didn't work my ass off all these years to get by on a couple hundred grand a year."

"We assumed you knew that judges on the Supreme Court don't necessarily get rich," Mr. Card said. "Haven't you ever seen how Clarence Thomas dresses under those judicial robes. We're all pretty sure he shops at Goodwill."

"If that's the case," Ms. Miers said, "then you can just withdraw my name from consideration."

When notified of the decision, President Bush told Mr. Card that he was "sorry about losing the most qualified person in the United States."

A few minutes later for some reason, Champagne corks were popping throughout the White House. I don't drink alcohol so I didn't bother asking why.


Ms. Miers can be seen carrying the
President's luggage for which she
earns $600 per hour.