Friday, October 07, 2005

President Bush and God take a meeting

It's a sad state of affairs in the United States of America when the White House spokesman, Scott McClellan, has to tell the American people that it's "absurd" that President George W. Bush talks to God. Of course, President Bush talks to God. What's more, God talks back.

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I remember Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld explaining to us new interns how America went to Iraq. According to the Secretary, "President Bush looked up to the Heavens and said 'Lord, I intend to invade Iraq. If you don't think this is a good idea, give me a sign like a hurricane in Texas.' Since God sent no hurricanes during the entire month of March, it was obvious that President Bush was doing God's work in invading Iraq."

(This isn't quite as dramatic as God dictating the Ten Commandments to Moses or parting the Red Sea, but it's still mighty impressive.")

On another occasion, I was picking up confidential memos to be shredded and I came across the President's agenda for the day. Naturally, it was a too good a souvenir to throw away. (When the President writes his memoirs, he may thank me for keeping this vital piece of information.) Here's part of that agenda:

Agenda for President George W. Bush
Monday, September 26, 2005

7:00 - 7:45 a.m.—Breakfast - Choice of Trix or Cap'n Crunch, chocolate milk, banana, surprise treat

7:45 - 7:55 a.m.—Defense Briefing - Don Rumsfeld to detail why War in Iraq is going well

7:55 - 8:00 a.m.— Tom DeLay Meeting - Discuss contributions for next year's Congressional election; ask DeLay to lose your phone number

8:00 - 9:30 a.m. — Talk to God - Discuss deficit spending, dealing with Hurricanes Katrina and Rita, War on Drugs, War in Afghanistan, War in Iraq, War on Poverty, Supreme Court selections, energy shortage, drilling in Alaska, helping Karl Rove, an appropriate Christmas gift for Mrs. Laura Bush, and if time permits, whether a vacation in Crawford is warranted for the last two weeks in October

9:30 - 12:00 a.m.—Free Time- Skateboarding in Maryland


Needless to say, the agenda goes on and on. But you see my point. President Bush devotes a significant portion of his day getting advice from our Lord.

2 Comments:

Blogger Mente Videbor said...

Nancy Jo, you better get home this minute! What are you doing hanging out at that bad man's place? That ain't God he's talking to, honey. That's the other guy.

BTW, W's 360 flip might be old school, but he's better than Tom Green. At least that's what they're saying at Ocean Bowl Skate Park.

4:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The President skateboards? Is he any good?

3:53 PM  

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