Friday, October 28, 2005

The White House girls take Scooter Libby out to lunch

Today was Lewis "Scooter" Libby's last day working for Vice President Cheney. Even though it was kind of short notice, a bunch of us girls working at the White House got together and invited Mr. Libby out for lunch as a going-away party. We reserved a large table at Sam 'N Ella's Cafe in Georgetown.

(Actually, until today I had no idea that Mr. Libby was unhappy working at the White House and was even considering leaving.)

Although the mood started out kind of somber, after Mr. Libby and the other girls had a couple drinks (I drank diet 7Up), they loosened up quite a bit and started playing games.

Debbie in Communications suggested we all play "Name the most CIA agents". Everyone really got into it. Even I could name three agents based on confidential memos that I've delivered. Bernice at Homeland Security Liaison named seventeen. And Mr. Libby did an impression of Sgt. Schultz from Hogan's Heroes, "I know noth...sing." Some of the older girls laughed. I guess I didn't get it.

After everyone had named all the CIA agents they could think of, Barbie, the President's personal secretary suggested we play "If you can only take one personal item to prison for 30 years, what would it be?"

I said that I would never do anything to get myself arrested but if I were going away, I would have a hard time choosing between a Bible and my autographed picture of President Bush in his Mission Accomplished uniform.

The other girls said stuff like Ipods and photo albums and hack saws. When it was Mr. Libby's turn, he said he wondered if they made chastity belts that fit over the butt. The other girls laughed but I guess I didn't get it.

After we got tired of playing games, I asked Mr. Libby what it was like working for the Vice President. Mr. Libby thought for a while, then said, "Like working for Saddam Hussein but without the laughs."

"Will you miss the White House?" I asked.

"Oh, I suppose I'll miss some things. Starting wars whenever we felt like it. Lying for Christ. That kind of stuff."

"So what will you do now?" I asked.

Mr. Libby said, "The Vice President gave me a glowing letter of reference and he's still got some friends over at Halliburton. I guess I'll make ends meet." Then he chuckled.


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