Thursday, July 14, 2005

Reality TV at the White House

Although I personally find it hard to believe, President Bush's popularity numbers seem to have been slipping a mite.

So a committee has been formed to strategize concepts to enhance the President's poll numbers. The Republicans Advancing Presidential Effectiveness committee is looking at ways to deliver to the American public a true picture of the greatest American President of the 21st century.

One idea I really like is turning the White House into a reality TV program — like the Osbornes but without the cussing (unless Vice-President Cheney shows up).

The problem with this concept, according to a consultant to the R.A.P.E. committee, is that most Americans will easily get bored of a family that goes to church and prays a lot and goes to bed at nine.

One suggestion was to turn Barbara Bush, the President's mom, into the crotchety old White House cook so she can stick her two cents in wherever things get real boring.
In the draft script that I saw, they had Mrs. Bush saying funny things like, "George, if your father wasn't stupid enough to go after Saddam, how'd you get so dumb?" and "George, I just hope when history looks back, it don't confuse you and your father. I don't think his heart could take it."

Also under consideration is "Who Wants to Marry The President's Daughter?" In the pilot, Jenna is arrested drunk at a Chippendale's show (whatever that is) and the President agrees to bail her out of jail only if she agrees to marry a good, Christian Republican. (Log Cabin Republicans..are you reading this?!!)

The show will feature twelve of the most eligible Republican bachelors in Washington who will accompany Jenna to church socials, AA meetings and anti-abortion rallies. Over twelve weeks, Jenna will whittle down the selection to the man she will marry in the season finale.

To get the new family off to a good start, the new groom will get an administration job. Secretary of Defense is the most likely position.

The final concept that I kind of like is "Survivor—Iraq". The entire Cabinet is dropped off in Fallujah and the winning Survivor gets to live. They haven't worked out all the kinks yet but President Bush has already said, "Bring 'em on."


Blogger Christine Brannan said...

What about The Amazing Race? Where all team members travel around the world searching for the long lost Iraqi weapons of mass destruction???

The team that makes it back with the location of the WMD wins and gets to be The presidents next Co-advisors... and pass him the memo of where they really are hiding.

GWB can then smile (with on of those gleam stars on his white teeth) at the camera.. and say... "I told you so..." then fade out.....

I think the winner will be Bill Frist... he seems to have really inate intuition....

7:04 PM  
Blogger Jerry said...

Hey, Nancy Jo. I think this could be a hit! You know I really liked The Osbournes, and part of what made it so good was how Ozzy was always walking around like in a daze or something and how Sharon always had to bail him out of things. I know it wouldn't be easy, but couldn't GW pretend to be clueless? You could have him get everything all mixed up and not be able to say things right. Then Laura could come in and save the day. Wouldn't that be funny?

I was thinking, also, of instead of having Jenna dating Republicans you could bring in some LIBERALS instead and have her LIKE them. Boy, I think that could lead to some really funny situations in the White House.

These are all good ideas. It will be fun to see how it turns out. I know I'll be watching.

11:13 PM  
Blogger Beaver said...

This is definitely the best Idea US gov has had since the A-bomb ! I wish my PM was as creative. You know, the Osbourne thing could work. Your description of GWB's family has lots in common with the Camden's and this show's been around for ages ! Some find it boring, but is has an hypnotic effect. It would be a great way to bring the good word ! ;)

2:38 AM  
Blogger Christine Brannan said...

I love the camdens!

Yes.. I see the resemblance... almost the same...

I mean.. of course, IF Eric were president and only had the twins... and the twins were girls... hahahah! I definately think GWB is a lot like Eric Camden. I would watch that.

2:43 AM  

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