Friday, February 25, 2005

Gay Alert!

Personally, I've got nothing against sodomites other than the fact that they desecrate the good name of the Lord. However, it seems like Satan is at work on earth promoting gaydom more than ever. And you may not even be aware of it.

A recent bulletin from the Christian Focus on Families has pointed out that "homosexual trends in television programming has been around as long as Jews have controlled the media." Here are just a couple of examples that never occurred to me until the good folks at Focus on Families pointed them out.

"The Honeymooners" ought to have a float in the Gay Pride Parade. Ralph Kramden and Ed Norton spend every episode trying to get away from their wives, trying to be with each other and their other men friends. The Raccoon Lodge was undoubtedly a subtle code name for steam bath. Both the Kramdens and the Nortons were childless couples indicating homosexual husbands who could not procreate with their wives.

"The Lone Ranger" was a typical 1950s program aimed at converting healthy young American boys into homosexuals by promoting the concept that two men - The Lone Ranger and Tonto - could enjoy an adventurous outdoor relationship without women. Add in the tight pants and mask and the show suggested to Boy Scouts that they could grow into men without Girl Guides.

Why did the fellow who played Superman in the 1950s show commit suicide? It's because he was forced to play a gay superhero. Every time Clark Kent came out of the closet, he was Superman. As you might remember, Lois Lane, a very attractive young woman practically threw herself at Superman. Yet, unlike a normal man, he resisted, probably saving himself for Jimmy Olsen.

Other gay shows: "Petticoat Junction" - a lesbian fantasia; "Car 54 Where are You?" - gay policemen cruising; and "Captain Kangaroo" - with Mr. Greenjeans, enough said.

The Focus on Families bulletin also included a very sad note about President's Bush's father.
Bill:George Sr.
It seems that George H.W. Bush and former President Clinton have been traveling around together a lot lately, off to tropical islands and beaches in Thailand. There have been numerous photographs of Bush Sr. and Clinton "touching". One suspects that since his heart operation, the slimy Clinton can no longer have relations with women. Which leaves him the gay option. But why did he have to choose the President's father?

On a happier note, we received a short letter from my retarded brother Rick Bob who is being detained under the Patriot Act. Although the part of the letter that said were he was being detained was blacked out, as was the part about how he was being treated, we did learn that the folks around him were teaching him how to speak Arab. I'm so proud that he's getting an education while he's away.


Blogger Kylynara said...

One quick point of advice.. lay off the crack.

4:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Nancy, you're brilliant.

I'd almost believe you were truly a conservative after reading this. You come across as so serious and sincere even though you plainly know that what you're saying is absolute hogwash.

You have a brilliant future as a political satirist ahead of you.

Keep up the good work.

6:14 PM  
Blogger Mark said...

Har Har! Good stuff kid! Keep it up, if for no other reason than to piss off Bush worshipping wingnuts like kylynara.

8:44 PM  

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