Thursday, September 22, 2005

Let us pray

My hometown is Waco, Texas, just a short ride from President Bush's ranch in Crawford.

As Hurricane Rita heads straight for the Texas coast, I am praying extra hard to the Lord that He spare Waco and the Crawford ranch, which are only about 240 miles from Galveston.

As you might remember, when Hurricane Katrina entered the Gulf of Mexico, I prayed that the Lord spare Texas and my prayer was answered. Here's my prayer for Hurricane Rita.

Lord, I can understand You sending a hurricane into the Florida Keys which are filled with Sodomites, although it turns out You didn't hit the Keys very hard after all. I guess in Your Goodness, even Sodomites have the right to live.

Now for some reason, You've got a category 5 hurricane heading straight for the people in America who love You the most. Right now, there are a million Texans in trucks taking all their worldly guns and heading inland. Is this a test? It always seems that You're testing the most devout of us while atheists, Sodomites and even some Muslims like those rich sheiks go through life contented as a puppy on its momma's teat.

If it's a test, You can bet the folks of Texas will pass with flying colors. You can blow down every church in Galveston and Corpus Christi and we Christians will just rebuild them higher and more beautiful than before so we can worship Your Goodness with even greater conviction.

And don't You worry about flooding another city, Lord. America has money to burn when it comes to spending billions to rebuild after one of Your "Acts".

Lord, all I ask is that You spare President Bush's ranch in Crawford and my family home in Waco where Daddy just put in a new spa by the pool and just repainted the stable.

And if You've got any sparing left, maybe You could spare the Republican Party office in downtown Waco, which just took delivery of a new Xerox machine.

Lord, I know this Hurricane Rita is for the best. Obviously, You've got some cleaning to do. But no one loves You more than we Christian Republicans, so try to limit Your damage to Democratic districts.

I pray and I know that President Bush prays that You'll miraculously make the hurricane disappear before it reaches land. In fact, it seems that all that President Bush does is pray. Please Lord, cut him some slack. There are even some Republicans who are starting to believe that President Bush was not sent by You to do Your work on earth.

Give President Bush the power you gave to Moses and let President Bush part the hurricane so that half goes to Mexico and the other half goes to Canada.

Blessed are You Lord.

I really believe the Lord has heard my prayers.


Blogger Ron Franscell said...

From MSM Blogger Ron Franscell in Beaumont, Texas. ...

Some 40 hours from now, Hurricane Rita will plow ashore somewhere less than one hour's drive from where I sit. We're unlikely to dodge this 500-mile-wide bullet, but in the peculiar counter-clockwise morphology of hurricanes, one might pray for a few miles of wobble. Why? Because one side (the east) tends to be more destructive than the other (the west), and the leading edge (the so-called "right-front") packs the most lethal impact. So, when expecting the company of hurricanes, try to sit on the left.

The NOAA's 10 a.m. Central forecast moved "Ground Zero" slightly east from the Bolivar Peninsula -- only a half-hour southwest of us -- to Port Arthur, the port and petrochemical complex due south of Beaumont. It is a major component of our coverage area, a working-class city with some of the same socio-economic fragility that was exposed in New Orleans by Hurricane Katrina. In real time, only a few minutes would separate the bang-bang impacts on Port Arthur and Beaumont. That's how close we are.

If Rita continues to track eastward -- likely falling into the draft behind the protective high-pressure system now moving out of here -- Beaumont and Southeast Texas might find itself sitting on Rita's left. Or Rita might stay the course and plow into Port Arthur. Or she might back-track toward Galveston again. The only true prediction can be that CNN's intrepid storm-chasers will be on the move through Friday night.

So we're caught up in the swirling crosswinds of uncertainty, too. We are now under a mandatory evacuation, so we have no readers waiting home for our carriers, at least not in any dependable pattern. We have too few pressmen to run the press, too few mailroom personnel to manage the inserting and distribution, no carriers (even if we'd send them into a storm with a scrap of paper that's worth 50 cents.) So we have determined that for the next few days, our newspaper will be online exclusively.

Whether we'll decamp to Lake Charles, La., or hunker down here, we haven't made a final decision. In the wee hours of Saturday, Lake Charles might be closer to Ground Zero than we are. Or not. Lake Charles is also under and evacuation order, we're told. So are the rather remote inland towns of Jasper and Newton, north of us. We've tried to scatter our limited reporting resources around the region to anticipate the many stories the Rita is spawning -- evacuees, the people who provide them sanctuary, the useful information they might need, and a view of the homeland they'll want.

This morning, I rose an hour before dawn to check the storm track. The skies here were clear and warm, and utterly still. Not eerily, but ominously. I knew that within 48 hours, the dawn would turn to a boil, slicing through us. In the dark, I lowered the pool level, took down a few wind bells from Paolo Soleri's commune in Arizona, and stowed anything that might be swept up by wind as a lethal projectile. I put some canned food in a box and took a couple books I'd hate to lose. And I threw in two extras, for perverse writerly reasons: "Flood" by Robert Penn Warren and "Sudden Times" by a friend, Irish novelist Dermot Healy. Glancing through the titles on the shelf, I remembered planting potatoes at Dermot's western Ireland cottage on St. Patrick's Day 2000, a different kind of morning. I wanted to keep the thought.

Keep a good thought for us, too. Come Monday, all might be different.

12:53 PM  
Anonymous AhronZombi said...

Now its obvious the gov is creating hurricanes to practice for the rise of the new world order. yeah their will be a nuclear attack or somthing and they will say the terrorists did it and evacuate us all to their concentration camps for their own good. too bad that they take for granted the fact that americans are rebels by heart and wont trust the govt. they will just hurt their selves in the next stage of their fake war on terror.

4:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Give President Bush the power you gave to Moses and let President Bush part the hurricane so that half goes to Mexico and the other half goes to Canada."

That's humane isnt it, just pass the hurricane to two other, equally as important portions of this great world of ours.
How egocentric would you like to become? The world does not revolve arround the United States of America, and I dare say that if a hurricane did hit Canada or Mexico, that America would suffer greatly as well.

Let us pray that the people who did get injured heal well, those who got killed, I wish them a steadfast trip to where they will go, but I also pray for the people in Iraq, and the other Middle East nations that the Administration of the President of the United States has so elegantly picked out, that they will be safe also, even if they are in the middle of a war zone that is far worse, and has had more people killed, Americans and the 'Coalition of the Willing' included, than anything natural or unnatural that has occoured on America's home soil.

11:00 AM  

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